Integrity Is The Key

– By Dr Nav Ropra.

Are you fed up of people changing their minds?

Do you change when your circumstances change?

Don’t like patients missing appointments? 

There is a law in human behaviour which is one of fair exchange.  This is associated with exchange of services in return for money.  However, the same law of fair exchange can be applied to our thoughts, conversations and our actions.

Our words and actions are reflections of what is happening inside of us.  The thoughts from our minds emerge in the world as our conversations and our actions.

When you think of something, you say it and you do it, you have congruency.  When you have congruency, confidence in yourself increases.  Those around you will notice this and your leadership ability increases.  When your actions and words and thoughts are aligned, you are operating healthily and with emotional awareness.  Your dental team will recognise this in you and your patients will relate to you as someone they trust and can rely on.  It will make the flow in the practice environment much easier because when you say something, you will know that you mean it and others will know that you mean it.

What a person says and what they do need to be aligned to build a dental business.  That is one of the ways that the dental business demonstrates care.  If a practice is stating that it is a caring practice, and the team are all aligned with that vision, they will ensure that patient satisfaction is paramount.  Patients will see that practice as a caring practice and will recommend others to them.  Trust in that practice increases and so will patient numbers and consequently practice turnover.

However, the converse can also happen.  When we say something, and inside of us we know that we really don’t mean that thing, a conflict develops within us.  For example, you may arrange to meet up with a colleague at a particular time at a particular place knowing that you will never make it on time, but just say yes to them.

When you arrive late to that meeting, then you are out of integrity and your thoughts, words and actions are not aligned. You are incongruent and inconsistent with what you are saying and what you are doing.  You are out of fair exchange with that person in both time and space.  When this happens it causes tension inside of you as you start to become guilty of what has happened and fearful of doing the same thing again in the future.  This can cause a strain in the relationship as your colleague now has an opportunity to judge you with this behaviour – also known as feedback.

In our practices, we can be out of integrity with patients.  For example, when laboratory work is not sent on time and we have to re-schedule the patient.  This can cause an unconscious guilt in us and can affect our handling of patient care.  Put a lot of these scenarios together for one patient and don’t be surprised if that patient writes a letter of compliant to the practice giving you feedback on integrity.

There will be times when people have said something to you and have not kept their word and you have felt let down by them.  This may have upset you and caused stress and anger to build up inside of you.  Be mindful of retaliating here.  Without knowing why they are out of integrity can be embarrassing if you simply fly off the rails at them using integrity as your yardstick.  Find out and be curious and accepting of others when their words and actions are incongruent.  A simple reminder that you were waiting for them and you felt let down by them may be all that is needed at most for them to get the message.

When you are incongruent, it would be a wise idea to go back and bring that matter into fair exchange.  Share from your heart what actually happened and why you were out of integrity and do it with respect and with sensitivity for the other and for yourself.

The more you are able to do that, then the more you will get to hear your own reasons for being out of integrity and then you will have the information that you need to change this behaviour.  As it can take time for you to change, be gentle on yourself during this development process.

‘Give that which you want the most in life!’ 

If you want respect, be respectful.  

If you want trust, be trusting,  

If you want integrity, have integrity. 

For your life to change, you need to change first and integrity is one of the most essential tools for this to happen.